Ugandans who refuse to develop must be ‘caned’ appropriately

Op-Ed: African feudal and medieval European leadership and management systems (styles) that were soon exported by the Imperialist West to their New World colonies of Africa, Asia, and the Americas were based on ‘Carrot and Stick”.

This is a rudimentary ancient human labor theory that posits that a donkey or ox can be caused to walk distances using either a carrot placed in front of it or a cane, lash, or hip.

Both work to attain the same goal, but each used alone may yield only a temporary effort and impact before the donkey’sees an angel and starts speaking” and Balak doesn’t know what to do as Balaam approaches. Or was it the other way around?

I still don’t remember if it was Gipiri or Labongo who began the ‘beef’ because I was only caned by the colonial education system based in Uganda to cram it and pass at my time of education. In my time, no teacher ever rewarded a student or pupil with a carrot, but only canes.

So it may appear that our generation passed and we are now in charge of this nation, but as I told you, canes alone (forceful management methods) develop a human into a donkey, which starts to talk faster than if motivators were awarded to the same laboring animal.

True inspiration to labor sprouts from rewards (or honest promises) by labor managers, leading by example, and practical demonstrations by leaders, but lazy and ignorant leadership usually seeks to bypass the carrot.

Using a combination of ‘Carrot and Stick’ is therefore the only universally workable tool to balance the potential shortcomings of either style alone. The slave traders whipped Africans to death or disability. That is a talking donkey because what usually made the slave trade industry costly as a business (kibalo) in Brazil, for example, was the continuous importation of new slaves to replace those who would die off daily due to the harsh sticks of the slave master’s void of carrots.

Imagine having to buy a new tractor every season of farming. Does it matter how much profit you attain?

In Uganda and the modern world of today, things have changed. The Stick still exists, but in less barbaric ways. Business executives of today are not like the ones of the Imperial British East African Company, whereby coffee in Uganda was known as KIBOKO.

One either had to grow it and develop it or be caned by the Colonial masters and their stooges of an administrator; usually Baganda elites from Central Uganda spread out all over coffee-growing regions of today’s Uganda as “cane mongers.”.

In the history of Ugandan labor dynamics, the donkey began by saying ‘Nyangire” in Runyoro, and that was the end of Stick in Bunyoro administrations. All Ganda elite administrators in Bunyoro were fired by Britain (as if it were Pokino’s idea in the first place). Then came back the British Manager with only carrots till independence in the 1950s in Uganda. But it was already late.

The canes had done enough mutation to the souls of Ugandans, who despised anything to do with Buganda, as Obote from another territory soon disposed of the Kabaka of Buganda, Mutesa II, and exiled him to where he had been exiled by the British about a decade ago. The stick system that Mengo had used on other Ugandans to grow KIBOKO coffee had created the foundation for future labor interactions that were destructive.

PDM, Emyooga, YLP, etc. are programs that are well-funded and tested to work, not only in current Uganda but in many different nations that were able to eliminate poverty in a few decades, like China, South Korea, Singapore, etc., but some Ugandan citizens have refused to join them.

Some have sabotaged these programs for selfish benefit, as in the case of those asking for ‘Enjawulo’ before recruitment. Some have simply taken the ‘Kiboko planting money” and used it to drink KWETE. The Imperialists, who turned Uganda into the richest country in Africa using KIBOKO, would have had all their arms broken by now if they were still alive and in charge of PDM, Emyooga, etc.

Times have changed, and STICK also changes with time. The way your grandparents were made to work may not work for a modern Ugandan. The population of those to supervise and cane has since multiplied to ‘incanable’ levels. The government of Uganda has to therefore come up with new theories of ‘sticking’ open saboteurs, crooks, and lazy adults because it must be done.

The reward (carrot) for these wealth creation interventions by the NRM government led by Gen. Museveni is, first of all, wealth itself. I presume no Ugandan wants poverty. The second can be designed in success stories aired on TV, social media, sponsorship for children of adoptive implementers, heroine medals, etc.

The cane can be, just like all Ugandans were forced to have national IDs, and the law can be fine-tuned to say, “ALL able bodies Ugandans MUST be Part of a PRODUCTIVE and Functional Honest Development SACCO, Before they can Get an ID”… Tuone if they won’t subscribe to growth (Lonyo) and development (Dongo Lobo) and become rich by force.

Neda,,, Have I touched any of YOU? Why are you angry? Because I have contacted you with a KIBOKO for failing to grow coffee, you need to buy iron sheets in Kampala. Who does it benefit? Me or you?

I have not touched anyone. I have just updated the Stick from the colonial style to Dotcom, which can PAIN you for real.

Why should an adult get a Ugandan national ID when he or she has been chosen to be poor? Why?? Go where those who want to remain poor stay. Here, we all produce something for sale in a United African way.

The other canes of whipping your behinds would not work for you as you would become rebels in 24 hours and be destroyed by freedom fighters, and you are too many ‘culprits”.

It wouldn’t work on me too. At Kiswa Primary School, we were caned at least five canes a day for 365 days. The ones from Sunday had to be fitted into the week schedule by Mr. Were of Kiswa Primary School, Mbuya/Bugolobi. But by the time we reached the 100th day, our buttons were now resistant to canes.

That’s how the human body works. The immune system turns off vital nerves, starts to make stronger cells like the ones under your feet, and the cane begins to mean nothing as a punishment. My first girlfriend won because I offered to “chew canes” on her behalf. Yes, Mr. Were would allow ‘freedom fighters” to offer to be caned to “save” any culprit. This lady, Nakato, was too beautiful for me to allow her to be caned, so I went and took all her seven and asked Mr. Were to add me to the next crime she was about to commit. This is when Mr. Were, one of the best mathematicians in Uganda’s history, realized that he had successfully poisoned the children with a cane (stick) and had created notoriously complicated rebels with nothing left that he could use appropriately to correct or punish them at his disposal.

Now what more can Israel do to Gazans than kill another 40,000?? The next day, he was so angry that he hit another pupil with an electric wire on his head, causing serious bleeding that was his first ever punishment as a Ugandan academician in decades.

May Mr. Were rest in peace, as he passed away a few years ago. But from him, I attained Distinction 1 in Mathematics, a result that I don’t think I ever needed to be canned like that. All we needed was inspiration, and some canes, of course, but not the ones that make the donkey talk and even see angels.

So, think of other ways, apart from the ones I suggested above, that can be used to “cane Ugandans” into compulsory growth and development that can ‘pain’ the culprit without the body and mind mutating into an unpunishable human being. Also, think of more categories of ‘carrot’ (rewards) that can be designed by the government so as to inspire all able-bodied citizens to participate in the development of their own societies and themselves, and email oildimes@gmail.com.

The author is Prof. Makombo Jago Minyang Asiimwe Ndahura, the Assistant Resident District Commissioner, Masindi.

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